Crazy little thing called cholesterol.

It has just come to my attention that the Queen song “Crazy Little Thing Called Love” is now being used in a McCain French fries commercial.

At first I thought, “Well, maybe John Deacon wrote the song. Maybe it’s his choice to stoop to this level, even though he already has more money than God.” But no. Freddie wrote that one, as I suspected.

Freddie mercury has been dead for close to twenty years now. I somehow doubt he wrote a rockabilly-flavoured love song with potato grease in mind. If the other members of Queen think putting his song in a fucking French fry commercial is a fitting tribute to his talent, they’re a collective disgrace to the world of music and deserve to be horsewhipped. And if they just did it for a quick buck, then they’re a collective disgrace to the world of music and deserve to be horsewhipped by Keanu Reeves. In a corset. While singing the song they sold to McCain.

What the hell is wrong with people? It’s one thing if you make the decision to sell your song to McDonald’s or something. You’re alive. That’s your choice. From an artistic standpoint I don’t agree with it, but I can sort of understand why it’s done sometimes. But taking someone else’s song when they’re dead and using it to sell running shoes, or French fries, or contraceptives, or whatever, so you can make money off of their work long after they’re gone? I think there should be a law demanding anyone who commits this abomination be shot dead on site. Maybe there’d be a few less stupid assholes in the world that way, and a few less musical corpses being defiled for cash.

Just my two cents.

6 comments

  1. I remember seeing that commercial and being of two minds about it. On the one hand I thought, “Well, at least it’ll introduce a new generation to some great music.” But then on the other hand, I thought, “Wait a minute. This guy was completely unappreciated and unknown in his lifetime. None of his albums sold anything. He made no money. He either committed suicide or died accidentally, and either way what led to his death was the depression caused by getting no recognition for the music he made. Now, a few decades later, you put one of his songs in…a car commercial? What the hell is wrong with you?”

    Evidently the people at Volkswagen didn’t listen too closely to the lyrics. They used a song about death to sell a car. Still, I guess it’s better than French fries?

    At least some of us still enjoy finding out about music the old-fashioned way. So hooray for us! I read about Nick when I was 14, in some all-music guide, and thought he sounded interesting. I expected his albums to be out of print given how few copies they sold, but “Pink Moon” was available even at the mall. And then I took it home and wondered how on earth someone could play guitar like that with just two hands. When I learned there were no overdubs except for one piano bit, and that was just one guy playing and singing “live”, it kind of blew me away. Like a feather.

  2. Very exciting here, we just yesterday got our very own local McVomits about 5kms away.

    I have an idea for an ad – a bunch of nuns eating fries and burgers and drinking “shakes”, singing:

    “Oh, (mc)happy day!, oh (mc)happy day, when Jesus bought, when Jesus bought, fries with that today.”

    Yeah, probably needs some work but I think I’m on to something.

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